skaikru | inbox @ comesailaway

[Oh. Never saw that one coming.

It's not the first friendship bracelet he got - he has a red-and-black one from Mizuki, currently bookmarking the mystery novel on his bed - but he didn't expect Clarke to give him one. As close as their friendship is, cemented in theft and violence as well as teen sass and video games, gifts didn't seem like a part of it.

It's... nice, though, even if he isn't sure what to do with it. Natsuno takes the bracelet from her and brushes his fingers over it, secretly appreciating the colors.]

Thanks.

[He won't wear it, but he'll find some way to use it. Another bookmark, maybe, or hang it over something.]

( he'd literally just given her a cure-all potion in a bottle, didn't that count as a gift? sure, a practical one and thus the most appreciated kind, but. still.

mizuki had given clarke a friendship bracelet too. well, like, twelve actually, but her favorite had been the white and blue one, a bit chunky and crooked, treasured all the more for its flaws. she still religiously wears it, despite things not being... great between them currently. natsuno's advice in the face of her admission that hurting friends just seemed inevitable had been do better, and it's becoming apparent she can only do that a fraction of the time. priorities clash with sentiment over and over again.

but the only awkwardness in this particular bracelet exchange seems rooted in natsuno's surprise. and she can live with that. )

Don't mention it.

( she cares less if he wears it than the act of giving. )

So, you thinking the next trip off the ship might feature poison again? I'm honestly surprised he hasn't used the ship's ventilation system to circulate something around here to drive us all crazy. ( crazy homicidal, not crazy crazy. )

I think that if he likes poisoning, then he'll keep doing it. He's not original - he told you so himself.

[He straightens the bracelet carefully and puts in on the small sundries box containing other keepsakes - CD player from back home and several dried flowers, one from Lumine and the rest from Tohru's, offerings to the friend he killed.]

Mind-altering drugs don't sound like his style. The whole point is to make us do things to ourselves. He wants us lucid when we play his sadistic games.

Poisoning wouldn't exactly be us doing things to ourselves either, though. ( sure, if the collars make a return, then it'd be more of a threat — mostly bark, only biting if they refused. )

Mind altering drugs wouldn't be all that original either. Tap into base instincts and any underlying tendencies towards violence. We could still be lucid throughout. I can think of few things more psychologically terrifying than watching ourselves commit atrocities with no power to stop it.

( that's the sort of suffering that stays with a person, and wets the ground like a breed more, like bacteria in a swamp. )

Yeah. [He can't help but grimace. That's what the scariest of horrors come down to - have your freedom taken away.

Still - he's not sure he agrees with Clarke's assessment.]

Except we already tapped into our violent instincts. You saw what happens at the "victory" party. [Darcy and Ebalon stabbing the captain, Max stabbing Ebalon, even Natsuno when he flipped the table over with La Pluma still on it.] I sat next to him - he was actually climbing the chair to get a better look.

( yeah, she'd seen what happened at the victory dinner. but max hadn't stabbed ebalon over and over and over, hellbent on killing him no matter what, and natsuno hadn't taken up the entire table to start beating la pluma with after getting her on the floor. not to mention many of the other guests, who'd sat back in shock and gone on to flee at the earliest convenience. there could have been so, so much more damage...

thus in clarke's opinion, they've barely scratched the surface on those instincts. they are lab rats put into a cage where a specific panel on the floor delivers an unpleasant shock, but not yet backed into the corner where everything threatens to hurt and they go completely mad.

but she nods along, idly. thoughtfully. )

...what do you think he expected to happen at the sleepaway camp? I still haven't figured that one out.

( it couldn't actually have been just a break, right? right?!?! )

Me neither.

[If it's a break, it was probably for the captain, because the nosy, feral menaces knocking on his bridge are also the ones who go on excursions like idiots.]

Maybe he wasn't expecting anything as much as he was having a joke at our expanse, watching us freak out even though nothing actually happens. If any of us snapped and started attacking people, it would've been a bonus.

( yeah, that's roughly the same sentiment she's been fostering. stoking, like the embers of a flame, and using the subsequent fire to propel the absolute rocket that cuts her warpath through other people's enjoyment of the amenities of this cruise. plenty of people had lived up their time at camp, as if nothing horrible was waiting for them just beyond the tree line or in the depths of the lake. and the only one she doesn't fault for that outlook is fio.

but at the same time, a newer tangent of thought. not brand new; the idea they're meant to make friendships in order to make the inevitable death of their loved ones hurt even more hasn't already been voiced aloud but. )

If we're just batteries in his proverbial RC car, I guess it makes sense he'd need to let us rest. Recuperate from any old injuries, so the newer ones hurt just as severely. Even cruel scientists turn off the lab room lights and let their rats rest. I'm starting to think it was that.

...and yeah, if a battery started leaking caustic acid, or a lab rat started eating it's own tail, that would have been a bonus. But not the main goal. God, I wish I could just ask him. Especially when he's no other option but to tell the truth right now...

[Natsuno nods thoughtfully. He thinks they're more batteries than lab rats in this scenario, but the general idea makes sense.]

...yeah, I get your point. If it's the same game every time, he'll get bored faster. [He frowns.] I don't get why he ignores you when you knock. I got him to come out once and I'm the least "fun" person here.

( all she can do in return is shrug, and at least pretend like it's not eating at her very soul that the captain ignores her. seriously, one of these days she'll rip out a chunk of actual hair instead of just metaphorical strands. )

Why'd he bet on me in the battle royale? Why'd he let me hit him at the dinner? The door's probably the same, it's funny for him.

[He grimaces at the word "funny", but that's exactly it, isn't it? Every time he tries to talk to the captain, he has to think about how to grab his interest, like waving a rattle toy in front of a baby...]

I'd say you can try something so weird that will make him interested enough to come out, but... he'd probably enjoy ignoring you even harder if he sees you're putting in effort.

( ugh. even the hypothetical added amusement the captain would get if she were to show up at the bridge door with a face full of clown makeup and doing an interpretive dance absolutely stings like a slap across the face. no, clarke's not out here trying to be amusing or "interesting", she's just going to keep her nose to the grindstone and try to pretend it doesn't hurt on a personal level to be so staunchly ignored. )

It's fine. So long as he'll talk to you, we've got an in. And as long as Skulduggery keeps sending out synopsis texts, we've got even more insight on how to go into the next conversation.

( it's still so frustrating she wants to put a hole in the wall sometimes, but it's fine it's cool everything's acceptable. )

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