( an important clarification, still fiercely proud her lil vampire buddy roasted the moon magic madman like a marshmallow. still furious he had to be stabbed through by spears to get close enough, but mostly fierce fierce fiercely approving. but then —
ew, another tangent of absolution.
and ugh, further compliments. two things clarke has absolutely no idea what to do with and always leave her feeling small and awkward, the chink in the armor of her conviction. like tapping a tree, but instead of sap threatening to spill, it's sentiment and staunch refusal, self loathing and truths ripped painfully from the deepest compartmentalized portions of her mind. she bites her tongue.
but between those two rankling sentiments, venti pours a great deal of honest emotion into text, and. she has to ask. has to ask, like she'd asked mizuki why he chose to stay after their mutual godly fuckboi hurt his feelings so severely... )
Then why are you staying?
If you've been hurt — murdered, specifically — and you feel lonely, if you're not cut out for the sort of love Mizuki wants, if you don't fully understand the relationship you've landed in, and if you know you're just being selfish...
Why put anyone through that?
( mizuki, first and foremost. himself secondly. even ebalon, ew. and now clarke too, as some shitty tangent. )
no subject
( an important clarification, still fiercely proud her lil vampire buddy roasted the moon magic madman like a marshmallow. still furious he had to be stabbed through by spears to get close enough, but mostly fierce fierce fiercely approving. but then —
ew, another tangent of absolution.
and ugh, further compliments. two things clarke has absolutely no idea what to do with and always leave her feeling small and awkward, the chink in the armor of her conviction. like tapping a tree, but instead of sap threatening to spill, it's sentiment and staunch refusal, self loathing and truths ripped painfully from the deepest compartmentalized portions of her mind. she bites her tongue.
but between those two rankling sentiments, venti pours a great deal of honest emotion into text, and. she has to ask. has to ask, like she'd asked mizuki why he chose to stay after their mutual godly fuckboi hurt his feelings so severely... )
Then why are you staying?
If you've been hurt — murdered, specifically — and you feel lonely, if you're not cut out for the sort of love Mizuki wants, if you don't fully understand the relationship you've landed in, and if you know you're just being selfish...
Why put anyone through that?
( mizuki, first and foremost. himself secondly. even ebalon, ew. and now clarke too, as some shitty tangent. )